What better pet to have when growing up than a basset hound???

Mrs. Murphy, having been informed she could choose what she wanted for a dog, headed for the nearest basset breeder. And discovered the following throughout the course of fourteen years:

Choosing the runt of the litter is not necessarily a bad thing - if you don't mind trying to catch her as she takes off for the road.

�Now you need to name her. Appreciating the necessity of putting some thought into this, you take time to study your new pet as she tries to make her way across the breakfast room, shoving with all her might with her back feet and falling on her nose continually because she's standing (with front paws) on her ears.

�AAHHH HHHAAA!!!!! She's figured it out! Lifting her front paws (both at the same time, please - she's an efficient dog), the ears are loose. And you discover that they're covered with dust. (Does that floor REALLY need washing???)

�And now you have it. Moppit. Yup - that's her name.

�And, of course, having been chosen by Mrs. Murphy herself, Moppit soon adapts to her owner and fits right in. This is evidenced by:

a. The fact that she was thrown out of obedience school with the money refunded. Not stupid said the trainer - simply stubborn.

b. Coming home one afternoon, Mrs. Murphy discovers Moppit sitting in the breakfast room with PINK FOAM coming out of her mouth. OH LORD!! She's caught some dreaded disease like the creeping canine crud!!!

No she didn't.

She'd been eating a

Brillo Pad. Dumb Dog.

c. Ever seen a basset hound try to chew bubble gum? Well, Mrs. Murphy has. And discovered that if you use peanut butter, it comes off their ears fairly quickly.

d. NEW ENDEAVOR!!! It's summertime. Let's try to eat a yellow jacket.

IT DOESN'T WORK WELL!!!

e. OK. So we WON'T eat yellow jackets. We'll simply howl at them.

f. But since we CAN'T eat yellow jackets, we need something else to amuse us.

g. What's a beach????? You're gunna WHAT?????

h. Mrs. Murphy has discovered that, after tucking the material in the proper places, a flowered two piece bathing suit WILL fit Moppit.

i. So, now that we're properly dressed to go out in public at the beach, what's next???

Picture this.

One irate dog.

Who howls.

Wearing a flowered two-piece

bathing suit.

Out beyond the breakers.

Sitting on a surfboard.

(She was NOT amused!!!)

j. Moppit had plenty of room to run in the 14 room house with two sets of stairs. Tearing up one staircase, down the other. Dragging her favorite toy behind her, often tripping and sliding down on her belly. (It's not easy to have five inch legs and not trip when you've got 22 socks knotted together and clamped in your mouth.)

k. WHADDAYA MEAN SHE'S GOTTA HAVE HER TONSILS OUT???

l. Can't find the dog. Anywhere. Searched the cellar, the first floor, even trekked up to the attic. One entire HOUR Mrs. Murphy looks for the dog, knowing she's got to be in the house somewhere - it's snowing out.

m. Well, the trainer said she wasn't stupid. Finally found her - nose first in the bed, under the covers, electric blanket keeping her nice and warm.

n. Mrs. Murphy dressed the dog up, took it anywhere (after Moppit FINALLY learned that relieving herself in the house was not a wise idea), cuddled her at night, ignored the docs when they said Mrs. Murphy was allergic to her and she had to go. And will always -�always - miss her.

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